ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

Smart man + smart woman = romance

Smart man + dumb woman = affair

Dumb man + smart woman = marriage

Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy


OFFICE ARITHMETIC

Smart boss + smart employee = profit

Smart boss + dumb employee = production

Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion

Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime


SHOPPING MATH

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.


GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.


HAPPINESS

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.


LONGEVITY

Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more willing to die.


MEMORY

Any married man should forget his mistakes, there's no use in two people remembering the same thing.


APPEARANCE

Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.

Women somehow deteriorate during the night.


PROPENSITY TO CHANGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.


DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE

A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.


COMPREHENSION

There are 2 times when a man doesn't understand a woman - before marriage and after marriage.


HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED:

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs andcackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

Women's Secrets..??

1. Kalau perempuan tanya: Lawa ke budak pompuan tu?
Makna tersembunyi: Siapa yang paling lawa? I ke, budak pompuan tu?

2. Kalau perempuan tanya: You dah makan ke belum?
Makna tersembunyi: Jom pi makan. Lapar ni!

3. Kalau perempuan kata: Lawa-lawa la baju kat sini, yek.
Makna tersembunyi: Belikanlah untuk I.

4. Kalau perempuan kata: Rasa macam nak pening la.
Makna tersembunyi: Tolong picit kepala.

5. Kalau perempuan kata: Kita lebih sesuai berkawan saja.
Makna tersembunyi: I tak nak kat you. Tak paham-paham ke?

6. Kalau perempuan kata: I suka berkawan dengan you. You baik,memahami bla bla bla...
Makna tersembunyi: Hish... I rasa macam minat sesangat kat you ar. Rasa macam nak jadi awek you je.

7. Kalau perempuan tanya: You pernah tak teringatkan awek you yang dulu?
Makna tersembunyi: Kalau nak gaduh, kalau berani sangat, sebut la nama dia depan aku.

8. Kalau perempuan kata: I sanggup berkorban demi kebahagiaan you.
Makna tersembunyi: Amboi! Aku kena berkorban. Habih, hangpa dua ekoq gak yang seronok.

9. Kalau perempuan kata: I tak kisah kalau memang betul you nak kahwin lagi satu. Asalkan you berterus-terang dengan I, bersikap

jujur dan berlaku adil.
Makna tersembunyi: Sapa kata aku tak kisah? Adil ke tak adil, aku tak kira! Langkah mayat aku dulu sebelum nak menikah lagi satu.

This is only an example. But it always happen in our life. If u don't believe it, try to ask your girlfriend or even your wife, weather it is true or not what is coming out from their mouth is not the same as in their heart. It doesn't mean that women is not honest in the way they throw out their feeling but, as everyone knows, women is a shy human.